Dreams...

Dreams... It is a subject which has been on my mind for many many months. This is due to the fact that I have many dreams, most of them quite pleasant, but almost all of them seems to be out of this world. That's what got me to thinking, how do our brains form these dreams?

Previously, I used to think that dreams come from past experiences, from events that may or may not have happened, events that trigger the 'what if' question in our minds that we have not put to rest when we go to bed. Or so that was what I thought during my years of early teen-hood. Only the happenings of the day, should there be any regret, it will all be analyzed by my brain when I'm sleeping. Kinda like the brain is just too hardworking at that time. That's just stage one of the dream evolution. Because of me having these dreams, I thought that dreams are there due to our subconscious, over the things that we regret.

However, as I grew older, my dreams started to change. It was no longer the 'what if' questions only, but there were also dreams involving a certain level of emotion. Often times, when I have these dreams, whether or not if I remember them, I can wake up with heart pounding or even at times, a teary eye or two. Even if I don't remember it, I can wake up out of breath, feeling a bit scared, sometimes jumpy. It could be a nightmare also, who knows, since I couldn't remember my own dreams. So that's stage two of my dream evolution. So with the addition of these dreams, I summed up that dreams are there to, one, tell us what might have been should we have chosen a different path during that day, and two, to showcase events that might have deeply affected me emotionally, perhaps events that I have consciously suppressed emotions during the time of it happening.

Lately, I have a lot of dreams that somehow, just doesn't add up. Before this, all the dreams still hold some sense, some logic in them. However, recently, my dreams are more towards.. erm... unexplainable things? Just two or three nights ago, I had a dream. I was in front of my apartment building, walking back from somewhere with a few friends of mine when I was called by my name by a girl. That girl was a total stranger to me, and she was on a Harley. My friends did not hear her calling, but I kept hearing her calling my name, which was a surprise for me since I did not know her. So as I approach her, I kept asking her, "How did you know my name and why did you call me?" When I was near enough, the girl started up her Harley, revved it up and drove the Harley up a wall and crashed (as expected of the logical world)

But after that, it all starts to go a lil bit weird, because after she crashed, there was something that looks like a spirit, a white apparition if you will, seeping out of her body and beginning to take form behind me. I rushed over to the girl but all she said was, "Be careful, it will kill you." I know its a cheesy line from some movie but then again, its just a dream, a movie for me... hehe. So I turned around, and saw the ghost(?) take form. At that time, if it was the real world, I would have freaked and ran for my life, but somehow in my dream, I had the audacity to even warn the ghost, to not disturb anybody. This warning was followed up by the apparition lunging at me, which for some reason, my right hand grabbed a white shining knife from my left pants pocket (Heck, I can even remember which hand and which pocket, it was that vivid in my mind after I woke up).

With one slash down the front, and onto the apparition's head, it shrieked and disappeared. So me and my friends planned to take her back to our house to let her cool down, relax, but when we entered the elevator, I saw that she wasn't in the elevator. For some reason, I only saw my friends around me. So I went out of the elevator and they went up. I couldn't find her and so I went up another elevator and reached my floor. It was when I came out that I realize that I was all alone, my friends had not reached the floor yet, and the girl is still yet to be found. So I waited for my friends to come up but when their lift arrived, the door opened, revealing no one. At that time, I looked around and saw a hallway different from mine. It was a never-ending hallway, kinda like those hallways you see in horror movies. At that time, I just stood there... till I woke up.

When I woke up, everything was fresh in my mind. Its the first time I can recall so much detail in a dream, and yet it puzzled me. For the day and night before, there weren't anything that I would consider as having any effect on me, no decisions that I made that said, what if. Heck, I can't even remember if I made any decisions on that day. And there weren't anything that was emotionally draining. So I was feeling kinda doubtful about my understanding of dreams. It made me rethink how my dreams are formed, the types of dreams and such. I believe that these dreams appear for a reason, and if we can remember them so well, it must have been a darn good reason, yet somehow, this dream, makes no sense in this real world that we live in. Is it a sign that I want to run from this world and live in a world that I can create on my own? Or is it just that my mind is too idle and starts to think of nonsensical things, just to play around? Until now, I still have no answer. Perhaps, I might want to take up my housemate's idea of having a dream journal, and noting down every dream that I have every night.

For now, I'm settled on the notion of idle mind giving birth to these dreams. I'll put this topic of dreams to a rest and go get some sleep. Who knows, I might be able to have another dream. =)